Apple release the new iPlug

[Iron Keys]

Apple have just announced their new iPlug butt-plug range, including the iPlug lite and iPlug+ (iPlug+ XL release tba)

At the cheap price of $5000 you cannot find a cheaper butt plug of the same spec. Try price out a Dell incolon® plug and get back to me with your results.

I am an expert in this field and have been servicing peoples butt plugs for years and the iPlug is the far superior butt plug out there. No other plug has such a quality build, all parts are made in butt house. There are studies that show it is cheaper cost over its lifespan.

It's part of the whole Apple eco-system. My iPhone syncs to my iWatch and iPlug so I can get vibrating alerts in my butt when receiving a text, and emails get sent straight to my ass. The iPlug also communicates with the iWatch notifying you when you are stretched out and ready for an upgrade to the iPlug+ and iPlug+ XL.

Once you've upgraded to the iPlug+ XL you will get alerts with all the new exclusive products Apple can stuff up your butt.

I'm not an Apple fanboy, I use other butt plugs from other companies for various other tasks. But why would you buy anything else after I've just shown you how much you should want Apple in your butt.

 

[Fade]

Apple have just announced their new iPlug butt-plug range, including the iPlug lite and iPlug+ (iPlug+ XL release tba)

At the cheap price of $5000 you cannot find a cheaper butt plug of the same spec. Try price out a Dell incolon® plug and get back to me with your results.

I am an expert in this field and have been servicing peoples butt plugs for years and the iPlug is the far superior butt plug out there. No other plug has such a quality build, all parts are made in butt house. There are studies that show it is cheaper cost over its lifespan.

It's part of the whole Apple eco-system. My iPhone syncs to my iWatch and iPlug so I can get vibrating alerts in my butt when receiving a text, and emails get sent straight to my ass. The iPlug also communicates with the iWatch notifying you when you are stretched out and ready for an upgrade to the iPlug+ and iPlug+ XL.

Once you've upgraded to the iPlug+ XL you will get alerts with all the new exclusive products Apple can stuff up your butt.

I'm not an Apple fanboy, I use other butt plugs from other companies for various other tasks. But why would you buy anything else after I've just shown you how much you should want Apple in your butt.

It's crazy how the porn industry is always the first ones to adopt new technology.

This looks very interesting but I'd rather stick with my open source plugs. At least I know what the plugs are doing inside my butt.

 

[Iron Keys]

This looks very interesting but I'd rather stick with my open source plugs. At least I know what the plugs are doing inside my butt.

Apple works very hard to ensure there are no sex slaves working inside your butt plug. In fact other companies are worse for it and have sex slaves in their butt plugs.

 

[2GooD Productions]

i can see this being an expanding business, things can only go up. Might have to get your hands a little dirty

 

[Iron Keys]

i can see this being an expanding business, things can only go up. Might have to get your hands a little dirty

I have stocks in Apple. and Apple have stock in me.

 

[Fade]

What are the specs? Does it require regular updates? Is it subscription only?

 

[Iron Keys]

What are the specs? Does it require regular updates? Is it subscription only?

You can get it cheaper if you trade in an old one.

 

[2GooD Productions]

Can we get slaves to make them in China so we make as much money off these arseholes, erm I mean valued customers as possible?

 

[YannFer]

As a non-native english speaker, correct me if I'm wrong but I think there is a proverb that goes "An apple in your butt a day keeps the doctor away"...

 

[Iron Keys]

As a non-native english speaker, correct me if I'm wrong but I think there is a proverb that goes "An apple in your butt a day keeps the doctor away"...

Yes, it's in the official advert.

Helps protect from ad-hoc prostate checks.

 

[Iron Keys]

Yes, it's in the official advert.

Helps protect from ad-hoc prostate checks.

But it also sends regular photos of your prostate to your healthcare professional, as well as occasionally third parties and for use across our advertising.

 

[Fade]

Can we get slaves to make them in China so we make as much money off these arseholes, erm I mean valued customers as possible?

Actually I think these plugs are made in Bangkok.

 

[thedreampolice]

Old joke!

Haters gonna hate!

 

[Iron Keys]

Old joke!

View attachment 6339

Haters gonna hate!

lemme guess, you bought 5!

 

[thedreampolice]

lemme guess, you bought 5!

Sorry i'm a man of taste and culture and you fools don't understand. I just keep on walking baby...

 

[2GooD Productions]

Sorry i'm a man of taste and culture and you fools don't understand. I just keep on walking baby...

"I art better than thou"
The cultism is strong.

 

[thedreampolice]

Yes, i'm classy AF. Ask your mom.

 

[Iron Keys]

Sorry i'm a man of taste and culture

Didn't know 12 year olds culture was considered a "taste", and vice versa.

I just keep on walking

In your Air Jordans.

 

[thedreampolice]

Didn't know 12 year olds culture was considered a "taste", and vice versa.



In your Air Jordans.

 

[thedreampolice]

Didn't know 12 year olds culture was considered a "taste", and vice versa.



In your Air Jordans.

PS I pretty much only wear Brooks shoes https://www.brooksrunning.com/en_us these days as they are owned by Berkshire Hathaway and I’m a Berkshire shareholder. And I’m training for a triathlon. So pretty much running shoes all the time.